PornXP

Porn XP! Will there ever be enough free porn tube sites on the net? Of course not. Are you looking for a good reason to have your dick in your hand but don’t always have time for all the bells and whistles? Of course, you are. I don’t always want to dig through a metric fuck ton of smut before gripping my cock. Sometimes I want killer pussy, now. Enter pornxp stage left. No nonsense, no-frills, just a front page full of hot sluts ready to hop on a free willy for your entertainment needs.

Pornxp is only 3 years old, but it takes me back to days of yore when the internet was growing its first pussy blossoms. Such a sweet smell. There was no room to waste precious processing power on elaborate bullshit. My Pentium 2 was a calculator with 80085 typed in. Now gimmie some fucking naked bitches and get out of my dick’s way.

PLAIN. SIMPLE. PORN.

Layouts don’t get much simpler. Skip wading through an endless sea of categories and get right to beat your cock down to a stump. The home page is a great wall of smut for your browsing pleasure. Menu options are minimal. If your balls want to narrow things down, you can filter by either “new” or “best.” A search bar is tucked in the corner if you’re cumming in hot with bright ideas.

I’ve noticed that in the past that a simple desktop layout can spell disaster for mobile use. Either they don’t use a separate mobile format, or the one used is clunky and sloppy. Come on, man, I got to work this site on minimal brainpower. Pornxp made me wonder how any site fucks that up at all. A simple top-down scroll is all I need to feed my rod the filth required to let loose a nut in my local Walmart parking lot. Is that so hard? Pornxp doesn’t think so.

The old-school energy pornxp has embraced means 2 things. First, short loading times. (Pun intended) I must have had 34 tabs open at one point. Second, no-frills and no filler. I swear you can throw a dart, and it’s going to land on a video with a sexy cunt, mouth, or asshole getting drilled out like an oil well. You will cut the time you spend between the urge to fap and actually fapping in half. I don’t know about you, but I got shit to do today.

So you drive a manual and like to be a bit more involved in the process? For you, a solid but not exhaustive tag list lives below the video lineup. I found the tags to be lackluster, but I like that they split theme listings from the model index.

Once you’ve made a selection and pulled up a video, you will be pleased by the high picture quality and a streamlined watch page. Some videos have a short description, while all have a related tab list if your deprived cock wants more. You and I both know it does.

Spawning below the related tabs is, of course, more videos. What I like here is that the videos are not related to what’s currently being viewed. They generate with the same algorithm as the homepage. This lets you continue browsing on random without maintaining a tab open to the homepage. I like to keep my cock on its toes and the world at its fingertips.

A porn site could have all the content I’ve ever dreamed of, but if the scrub bar isn’t on point, I’m crushed. Much like planning out the final destination of a great vacation, my dick wants to know what port I’ll be disembarking at. My member wants the perfect angle and position to row me ashore so that my seed spills only onto the finest bitches. I mean beaches. Pornxp delivers. The preview is large enough to see but stays out of the way if you’re still trying to enjoy the plot.

FULL LENGTH SAMPLES AND 4K

All the greatest hits are here; Casting couch, Brazzers, reality kings. If it’s a leading porn studio, you can find their material here. The amateur content is well-curated also. No begging for more pixels or better sound. These bitches aren’t professionals, but they have a good camera and a decent sense of lighting conditions. What more can you ask? They got to focus on cock gobbling.

I WANT MORE

If you fancy yourself a true connoisseur; if your library brims with the finest puss this land has to offer; if you have spent your life cataloging only the most cock engorging fuck fests, you may wish to upload. Follow the link at the bottom of the home page to submit your video. I thank you, and so does the world. Then go bust some of that good karma into your boxer shorts.

NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL PORN

It’s fucking fantastic that I don’t have to search long and hard for some decent wank material on this site. Of course, I appreciate diversity as much as the next guy, but I love that any video I click on teases my dick upright. It’s roll call, and my bed is already made. As such, there is little to offend the sensibilities here. Some may even call it vanilla. I call it easy listening.

That said, even if I’m not clicking to view, I like scrolling past the occasional amputee. I can file it away in the Rolodex for later use. Lord knows I’ll be in the mood soon enough. Those of us used to scouring the web for depravity may even feel like we’ve attended a church service after a visit here. I guess even a broken clock is right twice a day.

There are occasional pop-ups, and some videos will hit you with skippable ads. Hey, everybody has to make a buck. If a quick ad saves me from giving you my hard-earned dollar so I can beat my meat, so be it. The porn gods know that there’s plenty of fucking paysites for me to save my money for.

No matter what gets your rocks off, you got to appreciate pornxp for its straightforward approach. It has become a real go-to for me if I have to squeeze out a nut between important business meetings. Pornxp reminds me that great porn, in its most simple form, is naked people fucking. You can’t take anything away from Casablanca, but Endgame made more money. Ruth’s Chris might have a great steak, but who hasn’t been to an Applebees? When it comes right down to it, nothing beats hot pussy and great video quality. That’s all I need.