Honey Play Box

Based on the name, Honey Play Box sounds like it could result in a lot of sticky fingers and messes that are difficult to clean up. After spending the morning perusing the site, I can only confirm that’s true. Not because they’re a literal box full of liquid bee sugar, but because they offer the type of adult toys intended to help you generate your own syrupy emissions. If all goes well, the dudes will be blowing loads of cum and the girls will be squirting. You know, these gizmos might be a perfect compliment to the kind of media I review here at ThePornDude…

In case the intro was still too vague for the slow learners in the class, let me spell it out in clearer terms. HoneyPlayBox.com is a wildly popular, award-winning online sex toy shop. They’ve earned a couple of XBIZ Awards for their products, and their website gets millions of visitors every month. I’m something of a compulsive masturbator and pornography addict, and I’m always looking for ways to switch up the routine and save some forearm stamina for typing up these reviews. With that in mind, I loaded up the site to find a new toy to stick my dick into.

Let’s Play in the Honey Play Box

The sex toys on the front page are colorful and almost cartoonish, a far cry from the realistic fuck dolls I was reviewing on another site yesterday. I had to do some clicking through the selection before I found dildos that look like real cocks, complete with veins and nut sacks. They offer a wide selection of toys for men, women and couples, with a front-page spread including G-spot vibrators, male strokers, cock rings and simulated dingdongs.

Like any good shop, online or otherwise, HoneyPlayBox.com runs a lot of promo deals. As I type this up, the current promotions are obviously Valentine’s-themed, but I feel like they’ve got something going on pretty much every time I visit the site. Right now, you can get 20% off two toys or 35% off three, free Truth or Dare cards, 20% off for new customers, or 15% off just for signing up for the email list. They even offer a 20% Student Discount, which I’d argue is a vital educational service. Make sure to poke around a bit before pulling the trigger on an order, just to make sure you’re cashing in where you can.

They also do free US shipping on orders over $69. While it’d be nice to get free shipping on any order, minimums be damned, it ain’t hard to reach that nice number given their overall prices. They mention numerous times that they ship discreetly, but I think that’s just for the noobs who’ve never ordered sex toys before and are a little worried about the packaging. I’ve yet to order a fap sleeve or ball gag from any company who prints FILTHY SEX TOYS FOR PERVERTS on the box, though I have to admit, that would be pretty fucking funny. My mail carrier already thinks I’m weird, anyway.

Genital Massagers That Win Awards

The Warrior is an “auto-thrusting stroker automatic male masturbator” according to the catalog listing. It’s an impressive thing from a visual perspective, looking like a cross between a light saber and a Fleshlight, with a translucent end so you can see the soft, fleshy material inside as it spins and thrusts. It doesn’t look anything like a vagina, which is weird, because I wanted to hump it as soon as I watched the video. It’s a hundred bucks, but with seven modes, I might have to place an order.

I checked out HoneyPlayBox.com’s award-winning girl toy next. Some dudes get weirdly jealous and insecure about female sex toys, but let me tell you from experience, they can really spice things up in the sack when you’re playing with your lady friends. Some of my guests over on the PornDudeCasting couch test drive sex toys sometimes, and we always have a blast.

The Seduction looks like something out of a Dr. Suess book, with a wide suction mouth and a tongue-like simulator. It doesn’t vibrate like most female sex toys, instead sucking and licking those delicate lady parts in five different patterns. It’s $87 on sale, and well, I might need one of these, too.

What Else Can I Jack Off With?

The more I looked around, the more impressed I was with HoneyPlayBox’s prices. They’ve got a variety of pocket pussies that are considerably cheaper than you’d pay for basically the same damn thing from Fleshlight. I also found some textured male dick strokers that remind me of the Tenga 3D series, only they’re selling for about half the price. The Honey Play Box masturbation eggs look similar to Tenga’s eggs for roughly the same price, though these ones are styled to look more like real female anatomy.

If I have any complaint about the selection and the website as a whole, it’s that the wide range of products may be a little overwhelming and intimidating to sex toy newbies. Personally, I’d recommend a basic, non-electronic pocket pussy for dudes buying their first sex toy. The Zaki from Honey Play Box looks like a good option, and it’s hard to go wrong for $17. A similar gadget from a bigger name would easily cost you twice as much.

You don’t have to take my word for it, though. If you ain’t sure, check out the Best Sellers section. They’ve got it broken down into broad categories like vibrators, dildos, anal toys and penis toys, as well as BDSM implements, lubes and sexcessories. They’ve got Kimono MicroThin condoms listed as Best Sellers, and while they’re some of my favorite rubbers, they’re a little pricey from HoneyPlayBox. I’d recommend buying those elsewhere.

I’ve got to admit, this review has taken me a lot longer to write than I expected it to. I just kind of fell down the rabbit hole, checking out products and imaging what my dick would feel like inside of them. The site also includes user reviews, which can frankly be more enticing than the official writeups for these things. The Kai Automatic Male Masturbator Blowjob Master, for example, has a 4.3 rating with 136 reviews, with a ton of dudes comparing it to the world’s greatest blowjob. I may end up ordering one after I finish wrapping up this review.

After spending a couple hours perusing the wares at HoneyPlayBox.com, I’m ready to believe the hype. The internet can be a funny thing, where websites pull a fuck-ton of traffic as a fluke or just as the result of good marketing and SEO. Honey Play Box, on the other hand, has earned their strong reputation with a killer selection of products, including some XBIZ Award winners, with better prices than a lot of their competition. If you’re in the market for a new genital stimulator to play with while you watch PornDudeCasting, read filthy erotica or just daydream sex fantasies, this shop is definitely worth a look.