BestVibe

What’s the Best Vibe you’ve ever experienced? It’s kind of a trick question, because I bet you’d give your mom a different answer than you would your old friend The Porn Dude. Hey, it’s all good, as I know most of you don’t like talking about masturbation in polite company. Then again, I ain’t exactly known for my manners, so let’s talk jacking off!

There’s a good chance you’ve heard of BestVibe.com before, because they’re one of the most popular online sex toy shops in the world. They get a good half a million visitors a month, which ain’t half bad for a site that never gets brought up at family dinners or on the local TV news. They’ve been around for 14 years now, and I truly wonder how many happy customers they’ve had over the years. Better yet, how many gallons of sperm have been blown into their electronic dick massagers? The world may never know…

The Best Vibe I’ve Felt All Day

It ain’t just the website layout that feels that way, either. A lot of the sex toys on the front page look futuristic as hell, like something designed a couple hundred years after the Fleshlight. There are vibrating dick suckers, thrusting vulvas, simulated mouths and squeezing buttholes in convenient handheld formats. The animated GIFs keep the gadgets constantly moving on the page, enticing viewers to think, “I wonder what my dick would feel like in that thing.”

BestVibe puts the electronic male masturbators front and center on the front page because they’re some of their most popular products, but they’ve got a hell of a lot more to offer. They carry a wide range of sex toys for men, women and couples. If you’re worried your old lady is going to be jealous of your new spinning, telescopic fap sleeve, go ahead and buy her a fancy dildo to make things even.

Like any popular online store, BestVibe.com is usually running some kind of promotion to keep customers interested in parting with more of their hard-earned money. I’m typing this up in June, and they’re offering up to 69% off as part of their 69 Day special. (Because it’s almost 6/9, get it?) You can also grab 15% off your first order if you sign up for their mailing list. If you’re giving them your email address for an order anyway, it’d be kind of silly not to.

They also offer free shipping on orders $69 and up. If you were ordering from a pricey brand like Fleshlight, you’d easily hit that $69 point with a single item. As we’ll see, the prices here are considerably cheaper than some of those major names. You may just have to double up on vibrating cock rings and prostate massagers.

Electronic Male Masturbators on a Budget

A few months ago, I bought one of Tenga’s non-electronic cock massagers. As much as I love plunging my dingdong into the thing, I kind of wished I’d done my shopping here instead. I paid about a hundo for mine and it doesn’t even move without my help. Meanwhile, there’s a whole slew of electronic dude gadgets on BestVibe’s front page ranging from about $55 to $90.

I checked out the listing for one of BestVibe’s more premium fuck holes, a $90 unit called the Tornado 10 Thrusting Spinning Masturbation Cup With Suction Cup. It will stick to your shower wall for fuckable convenience, has 10 telescoping and rotating modes, and a textured TPE interior to work you over really good. They mention the clear window as “visual stimulation,” which is particularly useful if you’re playing with a partner. I don’t need to watch my dick when I’m cranking it, but I’ve found that ladies enjoy it.

At the other end of the pricing spectrum, the $54 Dylan Vulva Mouth 5 Thrusting Rotating 2 In 1 Automatic Masturbation Cup offers more than just a simple and catchy name. It’s almost as feature-rich as the costlier Tornado 10, with 5 thrusting and 5 rotating modes and the voyeur window. This one also functions as a penile trainer if you’re looking to improve your stamina.

The Prices Sure Seem Like a BestVibe

They have one full-size sex doll if you’re interested, but I’d recommend a peek at my list of Sex Doll Shops if you’re really in the market. BestVibe.com does have a decent selection of mid-priced sex doll torsos that might be worth a look, though. The cheapest one is on sale for $60 now, which is easily one of the lowest prices I’ve seen for a decapitated quadruple amputee sex doll. That sounds like a good name for a death metal band, huh?

Best Vibe’s collection of disembodied dicks is more impressive than their creepy room full of torsos. The realistic-looking ones with vibration and telescoping start around $35, which is what you’d pay for a low-grade off-brand vibrator from the local sex shop that smells like mildew and sperm. The selection on fake dicks and female vibrators is wide as fuck, and it gets as weird as you want it to. Who’s up for sticking a rainbow tentacle up their cooter?

The Best Vibes for Which Hole?

Across all their product lines—whether we’re talking dick strokers, butthole vibrators or vagina stimulators—they give customers a ton of features and a ton of options. Their male prostate toys offer gimmicks like remote-control thrusting, glans massagers, rotating heads, multi-speed vibration, heating, inflating and telescoping action. The product range is wide enough that if you’re looking for a particular combination of features, there’s a good chance you’ll find it.

One of BestVibe’s featured dildos right now is an 8.7-incher called the Wilson 6. Modeled after a BBC, the Wilson auto-rotates, thrusts at six speeds and vibrates at ten. There’s a suction cup to stick it to the headboard and a remote control to turn it on when it’s balls deep. It only takes 90 minutes to charge, and will work you over for 75. Damn, I hope this robot doesn’t steal my job over at PornDudeCasting!

BestVibe.com offers all kinds of fun for grownups, but for my money, their range of low-priced electronic masturbators are the real star of the show. They’ve got tons of products that’ll vibrate, twirl, thrust, suck, and otherwise stimulate the fucking hell out of your genitals, no matter who you are and what you’re into. Not only is their selection wider than most of their competition, but their prices put some of the big boys to shame. If you’re in the market for an electronic clit buzzer or dick licker, take a look at these.